Oh boy, are my nerves really shot! Martha has decided that we should take a vacation cruise. She has been dreaming about such a holiday for years. And, she says, the prices are now so affordable that it would be foolish not to book a cabin right away. Yeah, sure. But what am I supposed to do? Kinetosis, you know what I mean. Just thinking about that cruise ship makes me seasick. This is my worst nightmare – any kind of swaying results in headaches, dizziness and nausea. But that doesn’t bother Martha at all. She knows exactly how to solve the problem. Are you ready for this? She ordered a waterbed!

The perfect simulation device for the home! The thing measures 2 x 2 meters and will be delivered any day now. And then I can wear my swimming trunks at night instead of my pajamas – you know, it is like a practice drill to prepare for any emergency. If I tell Martha that I can’t swim, she will probably invite the local lifeguard to come to our house and stay overnight. No, no, she will have an even better idea. I can hear her now: “But darling, there is even a swimming pool on the ship, and they offer swimming courses, too.” Oh, well. Good night and sweet dreams!